The-Courier-recoveringnoah

Dear GPS System,

Was that necessary? I mean, really? Was. That. Necessary?

All I wanted to do was go to the Tyler Zoo and you led me on a wild goose chase.

It's the zoo. In Tyler. The drive should've been filled with highways, gas stations, and Golden Arches.

Instead, you led me down one-lane, rural, back country dirt roads in Deliverance, East Texas.

Now, maybe because you're just a computer, or a satellite, or whatever it is that you are.. . because you are not REAL.... it probably doesn't concern you to drive down one-lane, dirt roads past houses held up by cinder blocks. Maybe you don't start hearing dueling banjos playing when you see houses with rusted out junk cars in the driveway, 30 feral dogs running around, and about 12 men sitting on the front porch in overalls whittling sticks. Maybe the thought of ending up in somebody's potluck doesn't send shivers down your back, but it does mine.

Granted, you did shave 20 minutes off my normal drive. But, seriously, was it worth it? I was a nervous wreck by the time I got to the zoo.

If you're going to direct me to a shortcut could you please make it someplace that gets cell phone reception? I'd like the opportunity to try and send an SOS just in case the need arises. Really? What if I'd broken down??

So. Consider this your warning. You'd better straighten up or I'm going to trade you in for your great-great-great grandfather, Mr. Mapsco.

Comprende?